Booze, Chews, and Schmooze

The Jewish Holidays through drink, food and fun!

 I know, I had you at booze!

Jews like a good party, lots of booze, chews and schmooze (drink, food, and conversation), blame Sarah.  After Isaac was born, he was circumcised and, you guessed it, Sarah held a big ‘ol shin dig. 

Rosh Hashana – Jewish New Year

BOOZE	None specific: My recommendation: Jack Daniels Honey
CHEWS	apples and honey for a sweet new year
SCMOOZE	Rosh Hashanah Greetings L'Shanah Tovah Tikatevu  Literal Hebrew to English Translation: "May you be inscribed (in the Book of Life) for a good year Often shortened to  "Shanah Tova" (Good Year).

Yom Kippur – Day of Atonement: you fast on this day

I’ll make the Yom Kippur lunch!

BOOZE	WARNING: drinking after fasting may cause extreme drunkedness and hilarity at your expense!
CHEWS	Breaking the fast: Anything goes!  Eating and drinking too much and too fast after fasting may be cause for prayer to a god of another kind (porcelain)
SCMOOZE	Gemar Chatimah Tovah Literal Hebrew to English Translation: "May your final sealing (in the Book of Life) be good." This greeting is traditionally used between Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur. It wishes others well in the new year.

 Sukkot: Feastival of Booths, build a sukkah: live, eat and drink in the sukkah

Fall festival, also a time to remember when Moses and the Jews were wandering in the desert.

BOOZE	Any as long as it is consumed in the sukkah!
CHEWS	Usually fall fruits and vegetables, but any.  Again, it’s sukkah time!
SCMOOZE	Lively convo. In the sukkah.

Chanukah, Hannukah, Hannuka, Hanukah… Any way you spell it, it’s the festival of lights.  Shorter Chanukah: The Temple was destroyed, Jews rebuilt, only enough oil for the eternal light for 1 day, takes 8 days to make new oil.  The oil lasted for the 8 days it took to make the new oil.  Shazam!!!

BOOZE	What goes well with fried food?  I’m thinking beer!  But any booze will dooze.
CHEWS	FRIED FOOD!  Chanukah is the time to stick it in Michelle Obama’s face and eat fried foods.  Latkes (potato pancakes), donuts, and anything else fried. Chocolate gelt, can be used to gamble in the dreidle game.
SCMOOZE	Dreidle game http://judaism.about.com/od/holidays/a/dreidel.htm Play it online: http://www.jewfaq.org/dreidel/index.htm

Note: Contrary to popular belief, Chanukah comes at the same time every year! (on the Hebrew calendar, which goes by the moon cycles not the solar cycle)

  Purim: The retelling of the story of Esther

BOOZE	YOU ARE REQUIRED TO GET DRUNK!! Not only drunk, but so drunk that you cannot tell the difference between Haman and Mordechai
CHEWS	Hamantaschen  pastries in the shape of a triangle (Haman’s hat)
SCMOOZE	Retell the story of Ester and blot out i.e. clap, scream use groggers (noise makers) Haman’s name every time it is spoken Dress up in a costume (traditionally as one of the characters in the story, but any costume will do) This is THE PARTY HOLIDAY!

If you can have Christmas in July, how about Purim in October??? 

L’Chaim: To Life!!

DRINK!!!

Pesach: Passover 

BOOZE	You are require to drink 4 glasses of wine during the seder
CHEWS	The seder.  The seder means order, retelling of the story with the use of wine and food: Eat no levened bread, you must eat matzo.  When fleeing Egpt, there was no time to let the bread rise: voila! Matzo! Eat horseradish/bitter herbs: to remember the bitterness of slavery Eat egg: rebirth, renewal Eat charoset.  Looks like mortar, it’s supposed to remind us of the bricks the slaves had to make.  Apples, nuts, cinnamon and lots of wine.  (yeah,baby! More wine!)
SCMOOZE	The retelling of the story of Moses freeing the Jews from Slavery in Egypt. You all know the story (see “The Ten Commandments” starring Charlton Heston)

In General:

BOOZE	Booze is great!!!
CHEWS	Food is good!!!
SCMOOZE	Shalom: Hello, Good Bye, Peace Yom Tov ~ this one can be used on any holiday Literal Hebrew to English Translation: "Good Day."  Or the Yiddish: "Gut Yuntiff," which means "Good Yom Tov" or "Good Holiday."

Shabbat: The Sabbath (sundown Fri. to sundown Sat.)

BOOZE	Wine: usually that sickening sweet Manaschewitz grape wine, but don’t whine about it, any grape wine will do.
CHEWS	Challah ~ you know, braided egg bread. The stuff some people call holly bread. Also Shabbat dinner Friday night Oneg: dessert Saturday Kiddush: lunch
SCMOOZE	Shabbat Shalom: Sabbath Peace

When to Booze, Chews and Schmooze this year:

Jewish Holidays 5772	Dates in 2011-2012
Rosh HaShana  New Year	September 29-30, 2011  Thurs-Fri
Yom Kippur   Day of Atonement	October 8, 2011  Sat
Sukkot   Festival of Booths	October 13-19, 2011  Thurs-Wed
Hanukkah	December 21-28, 2011  Wed-Wed
Purim	March 8, 2012  Thurs
Pesach  Passover	April 7-14, 2012   Sat-Sat Israel: April 7-13, 2012  Sat-Fri